Aloha!

Tomorrow morning, we will all head to the Sacramento Intergalactic Airport and take a flight to Honolulu. Sweetie, the in-laws and I will fly from Sacramento, and we will meet Sweetie's sister and her new partner ( yes, it IS what you think!) over there. Althought Sweetie and I were just in Hawaii about six weeks ago, I feel ready to go again.

Work has been particularly busy this past week. My boss left the Department one week ago, and just as he left, a huge assignment came along. I have been working hard, as has the entire unit, to get the project done before I leave. I think we are going to make it. So when I leave, I can go with a clear conscience and not think about work while I am gone.

I will try to duck out a bit early today and get the yard work done this evening before dinner. Sweetie wants us to meet up for dinner with some friends. I'll have to work fast to get everything done before we have to meet them.

I won't get a chance to post an entry while I'm gone. I'll have plenty to say when I get back. Until then, stay safe, happy, and healthy.

Aloha to you all!

Let there be light

The house was a bit torn up yesterday as the electricians arrived to install the new lighting that Sweetie and I wanted. There are quite a number of new halogen recessed lights in the ceilings, and two pendant lights over the bar that separates the kitchen from the family room. Most of these new circuits are on dimmers. I must say, it makes a huge difference! We have lived in this house for over eight years and I had no idea what a difference just a few changes like this could make. The electrician is a lighting designer, so he had some really good ideas. He and Sweetie did a sweep of the whole house. He has many other ideas and we like them all. Too bad we don't have an extra vault of cash laying around somewhere. The electrician will be back on June 10th to install a ceiling fan in my computer room, possibly a fan in the guest bedroom, and move one of the recessed lights in the familyroom. He was not satisfied with the placement, so he will adjust that and repair the ceiling at no charge. We are about $4,000 poorer, but we think it is worth the cost.

The carpet cleaners will be here this morning. We have what seems like an acre of white carpeting in the house and they are in great need of cleaning. One project we hope to get to in the not distant future, will be replacing some of the carpeting. I would like to get rid of most of it and replace it with either tile or wood flooring, or a combination of both. We have quite a bit of wood flooring already and I really like it. This house is about 2650 sq, feet, so even with the wood flooring already in, there is a ton of carpet that needs to be addressed.

We will also be starting to paint the inside. We will opt for some color this time. When we had the house built, we had a slightly off-white wall color and pure white trim color scheme against the white carpet and meduim-dark wood floors. Very nice at the time, but we are ready for a change.

I was so tired yesterday after the busy weekend we had. I crashed pretty early last night and slept like a rock! I got up just a little early at 4:15am this morning, and I feel great. Busy rest of the week ahead. In-laws arrive tomorrow night, then to Hawaii on Saturday! Yea!!

Have a great day.

I Survived

What a day Saturday turned out to be. I have been mentioning the concert for a few days now, and it was last night. But more than that, Sweetie had volunteered us to host the end-of-season party here at the house following the concert. That really was what shaped my day yesterday.

I slept in yesterday morning all the way to 5:45am. For me, that's kinda late, since I get up at about 4:30 every morning. I read e-mail, then went to the gym at 7:00am for two hours. Sweetie and I went for coffee and a bite to eat when I got home. We were there for about 45 minutes.

When we got home, I knew I had to get to the store to make something for the party, so off to the store. I went I bought a bunch of packages of chicken thighs that I was going to barbeque and then re-heat when I got home from the concert. I also bought the fixings for my famous cole slaw. When I got home from the store, I made the slaw and put the chicken into the marinade.

My next task was to get the yard in order. I worked outside for about four hours getting everything clipped, trimmed, mowed, swept, washed, etc. Then I had to get all of the tables and chairs set up. That done, I grilled the chicken, and had a few minutes to get cleaned up and dressed for the concert.

I left the house at about 5:45 to get to the church downtown where the concert was to be held. The concert started at 8:00pm and ended at 10:20pm. So after my very busy day I sang a two-hour concert. But was that the end of my day? Nooooooo!!

I left the concert and raced back to the house to get everything opened up for the arrival of our guests. We had about 50 people here after the concert. It was a potluck, so everyone brought food and drinks.

The house and yard looked really beautiful, and it was a lovely evening here. There was a slight breeze and it was not nearly as warm as it could have been. People mingled, ate, drank, and generally had a great time. Since the concert lasted so late, folks stayed until around 2:00am. Then the clean-up began.

I cleaned up outside, Sweetie cleaned up inside. We both had everything done before we went to bed. We got to bed around 3:30am. It is now 9:30am and I am actually doing pretty well, considering the day I had. I feel a bit wrung-out, but I guess that is to be expected.

It was such a successful concert. We were nearly sold-out. And even with all the effort yesterday, the party turned out well, too. I am tired today and will probably take it easy.

Tomorrow, the electricians arrive to do the electrical install I have mentioned. Tuesday, the carpets are being cleaned. Wednesday, the housekeeper comes to clean. Wednesday night, the in-laws arrive, then on Saaturday, we are all off to Hawaii. A busy week awaits.

Hope you are all having a great weekend. I hear Sweetie taking a shower, so that means I had better get my ass in gear as well.

Have a great day!

Thursday

One more day to the weekend. Can we make it through?

It has been a pretty busy week. And for some reason, I have been feeling a bit tired all week. This is unusual for me as I have always been exceedingly active and a real early-to-bed, early-to-rise person. I was feeling sluggish on Tuesday after a late rehearsal on Monday. I would normally have gone to the gym on Tuesday night, but I skipped it and instead, went to the store and got some things to make dnner for Sweetie. He was quite surprised as he know how regimented I tend to be, and it being Tuesday, he thought he and I would have a quick salad and I would be off to the gym. What he got was grilled teriyaki chicken, pesto linguini, cole slaw, and a bottle of merlot. We had a great dinner on the patio.

Last night, tired again. Busy day at work. (Enought sentence fragments for you?) We had leftovers for dinner and then settled in for a quiet evening. I fell asleep on the sofa at around 8:30pm and went to bed around 9:00. I slept straight through until 4:25am, my regular time to get up. I feel great today.

It will be another late night tonight. I have the final dress rehearsal for Saturday's concert. Again no gym tonight for me. I don't expect that we'll get home until around 11:00pm. Then up at 4:25am on Friday morning. I'm getting too old for this!!

Life will take a decidedly quieter turn after this weekend, except for the Hawaii trip. It is just a little over a week away. The in-laws arrive on Wednesday, then on the 26th, aloha!!

Have a great day!!

Sweetie

Wanna know a little about the fella that makes me who I am? He's a pretty special and a pretty(!) man that has been a part of my life for almost 19 years. How did we meet? What brought us together? Why have we stayed together?

Well, we actually met way back in about 1979 or so, when I came to Sacramento as a Junior at California State University, Sacramento. Unknown to me, Sweetie was already here, and had been for a few years. I transferred in and decided that I would sing in the choirs on campus. That was the first time I ever laid eyes on Sweetie. I learned several things about him while singing in the choir. First, he was married, to a woman, no less! Next, he was a bit of an ass. He was really involved with an "in" crowd, and I was definately not one of them. We sang a number of concerts in those two years until I graduated and I moved on. Turns out, he did not graduate until after I did, and he started before me! And, he is a year older than me. But all that aside, I never expected to really know him or ever see him again.

I started working in the banking industry and was transferred up and down the central valley for for about five years until I landed once again in Sacramento in 1986. I was contacted by a number of performing groups here in the city when I arrived and one of them was the group I now sing with. Yes, I have been with this group for 21 years! Well, Sweetie was a singer in this group. I immediately recognized him, but he had no recollection of me.

Seems I was a bit of an attraction to him. He persued me, but I was very inexperienced and very naive. I didn't realize that he was interested in me and he had no idea that we had actually met before years earlier.

I became involved with a man, my first, at age 28, and Sweetie was just dumbfounded that I did not swoon for him. About a year went by and I was at a bar downtown one night, on 4th of July weekend. I was there and so was he. I was pretty blasted, as I had been to my hometown earlier that day to celebrate my mother's birthday, and had stopped at the bar to unwind and get over the whole family experience.

I was there, shirt unbuttoned to my waist, he was there, hardly drunk at all, and we connected. We left the bar together, but at the corner, he was parked one direction, I was parked the other. We hugged, and I turned to walk away. About a block toward my car, I heard my name. I turned around and saw him running back toward me. I turned and ran back, too. We met back at the corner and it was one of those turely horrible movie moments where we embraced and kissed under the street light,at the corner of 20th and K Streets.

He invited me home. I said no! In fact, we dated a couple of times before I "put out". But on that weekend, I knew that this was something special. Can you imagine that it was years later that he realized that we had sung in the same choir in college? He had no memory of me!!

We have had a few rocky times along the way. Perhaps I will tell you about them sometime. But to people like Ryan and Mike, and to Bigg, I would like to say that even after the most rocky of events, we have hung together. And you know what? I am as much in love with him today as I have ever been. OK. Our love is different than it was many years ago, but Sweetie and I are soul mates.

There are things that have happened that have constantly reminded me that this man loves me and has made me as much of his life as I have made him a part of mine.

We are quickly approaching our 19th anniversary. How wonderful it is to be in love and to be loved! Please to all of you, this is not a fairy tale. Well perhaps it is! But this is an example of what it means for two beings, not as in the "traditional" man/woman pairings, to find one another and forge a singular life together.

I can't imagine what my life would be like without him. I don't want to! But I think we are a good example of what it means to be married people although the "laws" don't allow us to be so officially. I love him with my entire being and I expect to be with him until one of us has passed beyond.

That is the story of how we met. There are many other stories that I am sure I will share. But, please know that gay men can be together just like other folks and be rewarded for it!

Best wishes to all!

Early morning

If there was eve a morning that I would have loved to throw the alarm clock out the window, it was this morning. We had our first of the two final rehearsals before our concert this weekend. These final rehearsals usually start earlier than normal and last a bit later. Plus, it was held at the church downtown where we will perform. It was pretty close to 11:00pm by the time I got to bed. Now, that doesn't sound too late, especially to you night owls, but for those of us that get up before the sun (4:30am), it makes for a short night.

I had a big workgroup meeting yesterday afternoon on my project. It went well. As a result, I have a couple of hours of work today to advance it, then the rest of the day should be rather routine. If that routine included a nice cold Margarita at one of the bars on the river, I sure wouldn't complain. It was about 90F yesterday, and should be about the same today.

Tonight would normally be my gym night, but I may play hookie. My final dress rehearsal is on Thurday, my other regular mid-week gym night, and with myshortened sleep llast night, I may go to the gymon Wednesday night instead.

One good thing (?) about living a very normal and somewhat predictable life is that I don't have any drama to write about. Unlike some of the blogs I read where the writers are dealing with life stresses that just boggle my mind, I just sort of roll along, not unlike the steady flow of the Sacramento river. I feel so bad for many of these bloggers. I have begun to leave a few comments where I had never done so before. My words can really do nothing, but I do hope that some support can be found in the positive thoughts I have for these fine people. I also read many blogs of people that experience life at a much faster pace than I and as a result, have tons of interesting and funny stories to write about. I'll work on that part. But I have always been a cautious and somewhat sedate fellow, so I doubt that I'll ever have the calibre of stories that many of you have. I'll keep working at it. Perhaps I'll find my voice.

Well friends, time to get ready for work. Keep good thoughts, have fun, and may your troubles be shown the nearest exit.

Have a great day!

Story About Mom

With Mother's Day fast approaching, I suppose I should take a few moments to relate a story about my Mom. First of all, I thought about her today because of a conversation I had with someone at work. I have related this story many times because it is both funny and really represents what my Mom was all about.

I'll start by saying that my Mom passed away about a year and a half ago and I miss her terribly. She would be turning 86 on her upcoming birthday. As I think I have mentioned, I was a late life kid, along with my two other brothers. My Mom was approaching her 37th birthday when I was born in 1958 and there was another three years behind me. Then, kids were born when parents were in their 20's, so my Mom always had a complex when people commented about her three grandchildren. "They're mine!!" she would exclaim with great indignation.

Well, one day when I was at work in the early 90's, probably about '93 or so, I got a frantic call from my sister (thirteen years older than me) that she and my Mom had been in a car accident. I probably turned three shades of white because of fear that something really tragic had happened. My Mom would have been in her early 70's at that time. I noticed a slight tinge of humor and laughter in my sister's voice that confused me.

My sister started by telling me that my mother had committed the act for which many older driver's bear great consternation. She had driven her car through the plate glass window of a local department store. My sister related that they were both OK, but that Mom was really worried that my Dad would kill her due to both the accident and the damage to the car.

I managed to get my sister to tell me what happened. My Mom was on a mission to buy a new sweater for my Dad for Father's Day. This local department store had a sweater that my mom really liked. (This should not be a big deal, but my Mom was a rather determined woman.) She asked my sister to accompany her to the store to buy this sweater. This store, still in the town where I grew up, as far as I know, was in a shopping center where you could park your car perpendicularly to the sidewalk outside the store. She did this. But, instead of placing the car in "park", it was left in "drive and she for some reason hit the accelerator pedal. The car jumped the curb and went right through a large plate glass window.

Now, in cases such as this, there could be injuries and excuses as to what happened. Nobody was injured, and my Mom completely owned up to the fact that she had blown it! A few minutes after the the "grand entrance" , and the shock subsided, my Mom got out of the car, got my sister out, and requested that someone call a tow truck.

She also noticed that the rack upon which the very sweaters she went to purchase was just a few feet from where the car came to a halt. While all of the administrative actions were happening, Mom went to the rack, selected the sweater she wanted to buy for Dad, and took it to the counter to be paid for. She used her in-store credit card AND had the store giftwrap the package. About the time that this transaction was completed, the tow truck was pulling her car, a gold Ford Taurus as I recall, out of the store.

She babbled all the way home about how my Dad would kill her and how completely embarrassed she was about the whole incident. But, this is so typical of how she was.

My Mom and Dad had little money, but she was a women of great dignity and drive. She often told me that she was a mother bear who would rip apart anyone who would attack one of her cubs. But she was also calm as could be and always was known to be a focused fighter.

The fact that she would have had this type accident and still command enough dignity to finish what she set out to accomplish, made her ever so much more special to me.

I remember going home for Father's Day that year. It was a few months after this whole thing happened. When my Dad opened the package, my Mom proudly announced that he was the only man on the block to own a $4,000 sweater! My Dad looked at her, knew exactly what she was referring to, as did all of us kids, and gave her the biggest hug! It brings me smiles and tears to remember it even after all these years.

Mom suffered from dementia the few years she had after my Dad passed away. She became such a shadow of the firebrand she once was. But I can always remember stories like this to help me remember her the way I prefer to.

I would like to say "Happy Mother's Day" to the memory of my Mom. She was a great woman. I am so lucky to have had this remarkable woman raise me into the man I have become. Thanks, Mom!!

I swear to you all that this story is completely true. It was covered in the local paper, and as a fourth generation native of the town, and with a family name well known, she was mortified about how this played out. I'll laugh to my dying day about this wonderful story, about a wonderful woman, who raised me to be the man I have become.

Please make sure that you all honor your mothers this Mother's Day. Too soon it happens that they are gone. Take it from me. Time does not heal all wounds.